AGE: 41
OCCUPATION: RECEPTIONIST/SKY EXPERT
TALENTS: Giving speeches. Woodwork. Tuna salad sandwich making.
FUN FACT: Can be found in room 301 of the community center for a special presentation of some stunning news. Please come.
KNOWN FOR: CEO OF L.U.F.A. LOOKING UP FOR ANSWERS.
BIOGRAPHY
Benjamin Jenks gives speeches every single night at his local community center to let people know the stunning news that he has uncovered: the sky is a lie. Armed with an easel and several large poster-size photos (thank you to Chris at Office Depot who helped Benjamin secure those photos at a reasonable price), Benjamin lets everyone know: chemtrails are spreading barium in the sky, in order to create a chemical canvass to project light on. Satellites in space shine this light onto the canvass to create imagery in our sky! Can you believe that? Our sky has become the ultimate false flag operation!
Benjamin lives alone and spends most of his time between work, the community center where he gives his speeches and his home, where he works on his website BenjaminJenksLUFA.com. The LUFA stands for “looking up for answers”, which is what Benjamin is all about.
TESTIMONIALS:
“Bendjamind is a real genius-man. He has BIG ideas. I am so proud to be his money man.” - Spencer Kahr
“Whiney cuck. No energy. Bad opener. Stupid face. Good friend.” - Kelly Churchdebrt
“Who is that.” - Howard Henry
AGE: NO
OCCUPATION: PURVEYOR OF TRUTH
TALENTS:
EXPOSING A GLOBALIST SYSTEMIC FRAUD OF DEMONIC YUPPIES INFRINGING THEIR PSEUDO-INTELLECTUAL IDEOLOGICAL OPPRESSION ON AN UNSUSPECTING PUBLIC.
PUBLIC SPEAKING.
DOCUMENTARY MAKING.
FACT-FINDING.
KNOWS EXCEL, MICROSOFT WORD, SALESFORCE.
DELEGATION OF TASKS TO HOWARD.
BIOGRAPHY
Kelly Clive Churchdebrt is on a pursuit for truth and he will stop at nothing to achieve his goal. Loud, masculine, and strong, Kelly works 24/7 to expose the globalists of this world who have poisoned the American sky-scape with chemical poisoning. His work in chemtrail research is internationally renowned, his podcast is listened to by thousands, and his website is one of the most highly respected alternative publications on the planet. There is no one more committed to truth and freedom than Kelly Churchdebrt. He is commonly referred to as the loudest man who ever lived, due to his loudness and his constant refusal to back down to oppressors and falsifiers. Due to his unflinching and never-compromised commentary, Kelly is highly sought after by government assassins and under constant threat. Every tweet, podcast, speech, post, and word uttered into his megaphone is Kelly making a genuine sacrifice and risk for the American public, knowing that he could very well be attacked by snipers in the bushes. We are all eternally thankful for his services.
AGE: 64
OCCUPATION: LAND OWNER/BELOVED ELEGANT STATESMAN
TALENTS: Making soup. Inviting people to events. Sky watching.
FUN FACT: Spencer’s son recently died.
BIOGRAPHY
Spencer Kahr owns a large home with many many acres of land and a large lake. He is very respected in the town of Big Run, people just adore him. Recently, Spencer’s son died. He has been mourning his son’s loss on his land, alone; perhaps he spends too much time alone, but as Spencer says, sometimes being alone is important. He often walks his land and whistles melodic tunes to the many critters who reside there. Spencer has many, many moneys and likes to spend his money doing good in this world. He is very cherished and respected in the town of Big Run. It can’t be overstated how much people just adore him.
AGE: 25. WAIT, NO, 28.
OCCUPATION: SECURITY FOR KELLY CHURCHDEBRT, MAKES SURE NO ONE ASSASSINATES KELLY
TALENTS: LAWN MOWING. EDITING KELLY’S VIDEOS. BEING KELLY’S FRIEND. KELLY.
FUN FACT: 28 YEARS OLD.
BIOGRAPHY
Howard Henry works for Kelly. He makes sure no one assassinates Kelly, and he’s done a pretty good job of it so far since no one has assassinated Kelly. He used to mow lawns. Howard Henry is a very good friend to Kelly and he likes dogs a lot, they make him laugh. He records Kelly’s videos and edits Kelly’s videos on his laptop. Howard hates globalists. He learned everything he knows from Kelly. Chemtrails make him furious. He looks up and sees them and gets so mad. Howard enjoys drinking but he does not have a problem and has it under control but it’s just fun to do sometimes during the day and other times. Is that enough sentences?